


My Reactive Love Affair

by ApatheticRose



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Student/Teacher, Eventual Smut, Frerard, High School, I Don't Even Know, M/M, Pet Names, Romance, Student Frank Iero, Teacher Gerard Way, Underage - Freeform, maybe some kinks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-04-17 21:05:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,870
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14197680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApatheticRose/pseuds/ApatheticRose
Summary: A story in which Frank is forced to move halfway across the county so that he can spend time with his Dad. While he's in town he meets a strange man with flaming red hair. Only later does he find out that this man would be his teacher.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so this fic is a collaboration between me and my friend. This is the first fic that we have ever written, but hopefully its great. This first chapter is pretty slow but I promise that there will be plenty of Fluff and Smut later.  
> xx  
> Thanks for Reading!

I never thought that the start of my Senior year would go so badly. If you would have told me three months ago that I would have to move halfway across the country and break up with my long-term girlfriend a week before school started, I would have said that you were lying. But, I guess you can never predict the outcome of your own life.

So here I was, thrown halfway across the country because my mother thought that it would be a good idea to spend my senior year with my Father before I went to college. This would have been fine if he lived maybe like an hour away but he had to live in Belleville, New Jersey, almost 9 hours away from where I lived with Mom.

When Mom told me this in late July, I was shocked. I had lived in Toledo my whole life and had all of my friends there, let alone the girl that I loved, Jamia. I was furious at my mom. She was uprooting my entire life just so that I could spend some time with the Father who never made time for me before I went off to college and became an adult. I tried fighting with her about it but she insisted that time with my Father would help me become ‘more of a man’ and ‘teach me how to live life away from home’.

In hindsight, she might have been right, but all I could think about is how much I would miss all of my friends. I mean how did she expect me to leave everyone I knew and loved?

When I told Jamia, she was devastated. We had been together for 2 years and were even planning on attending the same college. I knew this would be hard for the both of us, but what I didn’t expect was for her to break up with me.

“Frankie, you know I love you but I just can't _do_ long distance,” she told me.

Wow, I can’t lie, that really hurt. I always thought that we would be able to make it through anything. I guess not. I’m gonna be honest here and say that I was heartbroken. I thought that Jamia and I would be together forever. I know that sounds super cliche and dumb, but hey, I was a teenager.

So, it was an understatement that I had a rough few weeks. When I arrived in Bellville, I immediately hated the town and the surrounding areas. I mean who actually likes Jersey? Bellville was smaller than Toledo and felt more like a cozy neighborhood. From what I saw on the way to my new house, Bellville only had a few coffee shops and one local store. Wow, I really couldn’t _wait_ to live here. When I arrived at my Father’s house, I was greeted by a bubbly blonde.

“You must be Frank!” She said as she pulled me into a deep hug. I wasn't expecting to be greeted so warmly and hugged her back stiffly.

“Your Father has told me so much about you! I’m so happy to finally meet you! My name is Samantha.” She said releasing me from the overly tight embrace.

“Uh, yeah nice to meet you too,” I mumbled back to her. My Father never mentioned that he lived with another woman, and by the looks of the ring on her finger, she was more than just a girlfriend.

She walked me into the house and I set my bags down in the entryway. I looked around the house, half expecting my Father to pop out from behind a corner. I think she saw me looking for him because she started to explain his absence to me.

“Your Dad had to work today and he won’t be home till around five. I was planning on making dinner for you guys around six thirty. Until then we can hang out or I can show you around town if you want.”

“Uhm yeah, I actually saw a cool comic book store that I was thinking of looking at if you would want to go there.” I honestly didn’t really want her to go with me. I really needed some time for myself and my head was already spinning from all of the changes in my life. I prayed that she sensed my hesitation in going with her.

“I mean, I normally don’t like heading to that side of town, and I’m really not into comic books, but you could totally go yourself!” She said with a slightly disappointed smile.

“Okay,” I said as I shot her a warm smile, trying to ease her disappointment. “What time should I be home by?”

“How about six or so? Your Father will be so happy to see you, he never stops talking about you!”   
I shot her another forced smile as I started to head toward the door. “I know! It’s been so long since I’ve seen him. I’m excited to catch up.” While this wasn’t entirely true, I knew that it would comfort her. “I’ll see you at six, can’t wait to talk more,” I said with a smile as I walked out the door.

When I was finally out of the house, I sighed with relief. While Samantha seemed nice enough, she was also overbearing and I wasn’t used to that. On top of that, Bellville was very different from home and I was very overwhelmed. After taking another deep breath I started walking toward what looked like the town.

I guess my Father lived right on the edge of where the town ended and the residential lots began because it only took me about five minutes to reach the comic shop. From the outside, the comic shop looked like it came straight out of the 90’s. The exterior was extremely beat up and the windows were covered in posters for the most popular comics. Where there weren’t posters, I could see that the inside of the shop was small, but was packed with comics. As I opened the door of the shop, I smiled at the familiar scent of old comics. The shop was fairly dark, so it took some time for my eyes to adjust from the change in light. Once my eyes adjusted, I was able to fully look around.

The shop was quaint, comic books scattered everywhere. There were four rows of comic books in sight but there were crates of more comics on the floor. The cashier was right next to the entrance and I saw someone standing behind the counter, reading a comic. He looked to be about my age, but was taller than me (not really a surprise because I’m already super short)  and had a huge afro.

“Hey, dude.” He said casually, not looking up from the comic that he was engrossed in.

I nodded in his direction and decided to walk around the store to get a better feel for it. Once I was fully in the store, I could see that there was a small overhang that acted as a second story for the shop. After looking around at the piles of comics, I decided to head up to the second floor.

The staircase to the balcony was narrow and at first, I thought that customers weren’t allowed up there. Even though this thought passed my mind, I continued upstairs. Once I reached the top, I was happy that I did. Instead of more comic books, there were a few couches and some bean bag chairs. There were some stringed lights hung up around the walls and ceiling that I assumed was for the aesthetic of the place. I have to give it to them, it looked fucking awesome up in the loft. There were only a couple of people in the loft, and they all looked content to keep reading their comics by themselves. I looked at my watch and noted that I had about an hour to spare. With this time, I decided to grab the latest Batman comic and read it.

When I returned to the loft, I realized that there were a few more people there but I was still able to find a beanbag to sit on. I had just started getting into the comic when I heard a small grunt. My eyes flicked up toward the source of the noise and saw a somewhat taller man with fiery red hair. He was wearing a pair of black skinny jeans, a Misfits t-shirt and a pair of black chucks. Honestly, he looked like a much cooler version of myself.

“Nice comic dude, is Batman your favorite?” He said as he tucked a strand of hair behind his ear. His hair fell just past his jaw and was quite messy. From what I could tell, he was maybe a few years older than me.

“Yeah, I’ve been reading Batman since I was a kid, he’s really cool,” I said smiling at him. He smiled back and grabbed a beanbag chair next to me.

“I’m more of a Doom Patrol guy, but I guess Batman is cool.” He paused and looked me over quickly, furrowing his eyebrows, “Are you new around here? I don’t want to sound like a dork, but I come here a ton and I don’t think that I’ve seen you around.”

I laughed slightly and nodded “Yeah, I actually just moved here. Have you lived here awhile?” I set my comic down with my stuff and turned toward him, wanting to continue the conversation. I looked him over again briefly and noticed how feminine he was. While he was taller than me, he most definitely was thinner than I was and had a very feminine frame. His jaw was well defined and he had thin lips. If I was gay, I would have probably found him attractive.

“Yeah, my whole life. I hope you like it here.” Just then, my phone rang and I pulled it out glancing at the number. When I saw that it was my Father's, I rolled my eyes slightly and got out of my chair, walking away, giving myself some space.

“Hey bud,” he said brightly. “I just got off work, but Sam told me you weren’t home. If you want, I can swing by where you are and pick you up before dinner.”

“Yeah, I’m at the comic shop. About what time would you get here?”

“Maybe like five minutes.” I sighed in disapproval but nodded.

“Okay, I’ll be outside. See you in five.” I hung up the phone, walked back to my seat and started to put some of my things into my bag. I looked over to where the man was sitting and found him engrossed in his own comic. Before a headed back down the stairs, I gave him a small wave goodbye. When I reached the bottom floor, I decided to buy the comic that I was unable to finish and walked up to the cash register. The guy from before was still there and he shot me a friendly smile.

“All set?” he asked as I handed him my comic. I nodded and looked in my bag for some cash and pulled out a 5 dollar bill. As he rung me up I glanced back up at the balcony area where I saw the guy from before subtly looking at me. I looked back at him gave a quick smile, which he reciprocated with a blush. I cleared my throat and looked away, self-conscious about my actions. My train of thought was interrupted by the cashier handing me a paper bag with the comic inside.

“Here ya go, have a nice day.” He said, and I murmured a reply along the same lines.

When I walked outside I couldn't see my Dad anywhere so I took a seat on a bench outside the shop. I pulled out my comic and started flipping the page I’d been on before. After a few minutes, I heard the chimes on the door of the comic shop go off and looked up. I saw a glimpse of red hair and smiled to myself. I don't think he saw me, and I decided to go back to reading my comic. However, before I was able to do this, I caught my myself staring at him. I raked my eyes over his body quickly. I caught my eyes lingering on his ass and blushed. This was very unlike me and I was shocked. As I looked back down at my comic, I heard a car horn blare and jerked my head back up to find my Dad sitting in his jet black sedan. The car must have been recently washed because it was very shiny. The windows were tinted and the only way that I really knew it was him was from his vanity plates that read,  ‘DR IERO’. I rolled my eyes as I walked to the car and opened the passenger seat door.

“Hey, kiddo, hop on in. Nice to see you made it here safely.” I hadn’t seen him in maybe two or three years, but he talked to me as though he always picked me up from the comic book store. He didn’t look that much different, either. And by that I mean, he looked like his usual total douche self. Honest to God, I was trying not to be harsh on my Dad, but after he cheated on my mother, I don’t think I could ever forgive him. The car ride back to the house was relatively silent.

When we finally got home my Dad parked in the garage and we went into the house through the side entrance that was attached. As I walked into the room I could smell that something was being cooked in the kitchen. Samantha, or Sam as my Father called her, must have heard us come in because she bounced into the kitchen with a warm smile. Before acknowledging me, she gave my Father a quick kiss on his lips.

“How was work, honey bun?” I groaned quietly as I watched Samantha practically wrap herself around my Dad.

“Great, I had two successful craniotomies that ran very smoothly. How was your day sweetie pie?” I groaned again, this time slightly too loud and received a dark glare from my Father. The sad thing was, I had never seen my Father this happy.

“It was great! I had time to spruce up the house some and was able to meet Frankie!” She shot me a smile as she said this and I forced a smile back onto my face to seem polite.

“Mhm, baby that's great” my Father mumbled before planting another kiss on Sam’s lips. “Should we eat?” I nodded and genuinely smiled. While I am (and will probably always be) angry with my Dad, it was nice to see him happy. Whenever I think about how it used to be with him and mom, all I can remember is fighting. Instead of him being the tense, bitter person that I remember, he looked to be relaxed and at peace.

Sam and my Father walked into the dining room together and I followed behind them. Much to my surprise, the table was already set, and each plate had a serving of lasagna on it.

“I usually plate everything before you guys come home, so you can eat right away,” Sam said, as an explanation. “There's some salad in the kitchen if you want it, I just didn’t have time to bring it out.”  As she told me this, she sat down next to my father, at the head of the table. I nodded at her and shot her another friendly smile.

“No, I’m good, thanks anyway.” I sat down on the other side of my father and picked up my fork, about to eat the food. Before I was able to take a bite, my father cleared his throat to get my attention.

“I know that with your mom and stuff you weren’t used to praying and stuff, but Sam and I really enjoy praying before each meal. I would really appreciate it if you would join us in prayer.” I bit my lip and nodded, he was right, I wasn't used to praying, but I also knew that I didn’t want to start a fight the first night I was there. Before I could say anything else, my father grabbed my hand and bowed his head before saying the Lord’s prayer. When the prayer was over, my father squeezed my hand and looked up. He mouthed a quick ‘thank you’ before picking up his fork.

“Shall we?” he said beaming at us before shoveling food into his mouth.

* * *

 

After dinner was over, I was shown to my room. Sam had already brought some of my bags upstairs and I was told to make myself comfortable. While the room was nice, it was very plain and wasn’t ‘my style’. I noted that I would need to buy some posters and things to make it feel like home. I unpacked my bags and made a mental note to call my mom later to check when the rest of my stuff would arrive. After this, I sighed and sat on the edge of my bed, thinking about how so much had changed in the past week. I thought about how Jamia and I could be spending more time together, and planning how to hang out when school started. Instead of this, I was forced to move halfway across the country and lived with two people that I barely knew. My father never used to pray, but I guess a lot of things had changed since I last saw him.

Before I could wallow in my sadness too much, I decided that I needed some batman to cheer me up. I walked over to the dresser and picked up the comic before getting under the covers in my new bed. I picked up where I left off and soon became engrossed in the story.

As I turned to the last page something wasn’t right. At first, I couldn’t tell what it was but then my eyes fell on it. In the bottom right-hand corner of the page, there were a series of numbers written in a flowy, yet not messy handwriting. It took me a few minutes to realize that it was someone's number. Right below the number, there was a  small ‘call me!’ I furrowed my eyebrows and tried to think who could have written it in there. While it could have been from someone before me, I thought back to the flaming haired man. I smiled when I thought of him and decided to pick up my phone and punch the number in. I hesitated before texting him but decided that it would be fun to talk. I quickly typed out a message.

 

**To: Unknown**

_Found your number in my comic. Could this be the mysterious Doom Patrol guy?_

 

I smiled down at my phone before setting it aside. It was getting late and I knew that I should be getting to bed. Right before I turned out the light, I saw my phone flash with a new text. It was from an unknown number.

 

**From: Unknown**

_Maybe it is. Could this be the small emo boy from the store earlier?_

 

I groaned and looked up at my ceiling. I tossed my phone on the dresser across the room and sighed as I turned off the light. Who would have thought that I would be classified as emo on my first day in town? I guess this would be a start to a pretty weird year.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe if I update it weekly people will read it
> 
> Thanks again to my wonderful co-writer and best friend.

I woke up abruptly with a beam of light shining in my eyes. Before I completely woke up, I actually thought that I was back at home with Mom. However, as soon as I rolled over and saw that this was not my room, I was hit with the fact that not only was I in a strange place, I also had no friends and nothing to do.  I groaned as I rolled over and grabbed my phone, rolling my eyes as I reread the message from last night.

 

**From: Unknown**

_ Maybe it is. Could this be the small emo boy from the store earlier? _

 

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. Although I couldn’t hide the fact that it was incredibly flattering that the comic book guy had remembered me and actually given his number, it was still disappointing that he thought of me as emo. Sure I liked dark clothing and had a lip ring, but that’s not everything. I liked to think that I had more charm to me than that. Jamia had always made it a point to tell me about my cute demeanor, and who was I to object. I texted him back a brief description of his incorrect profiling.

 

**To: Unknown**

_ While I may be short, I am highly offended that you would call me emo. Why would you think that? _

 

I set my phone down and crawled out of bed to put some clothes on before going downstairs. I picked out a pair of dark wash jeans and a random band t-shirt and smiled as I saw that my phone was flashing with a new message. 

 

**From: Unknown**

_ Well, you have long dark hair and a lip piercing, so you look pretty emo to me. Also, you’re like five foot nothing, you’re very small. _

 

**To: Unknown**

_ Fine, you win. I am a small emo boy who is a giant ball of angst. At least I’m not a cheap knockoff of Clifford the Big Red Dog. _

 

I smirked as I sent the message and threw my phone in my back pocket before walking downstairs. As I walked downstairs I was happy to see that no one was there and decided to scavenge the pantry for something to eat for breakfast. After a few minutes, I settled on a pop tart and felt my phone buzz before I had to time eat it. I smiled, knowing who it was and pulled out my phone quickly. 

 

**From: Unknown**

_ I will let you know that Clifford was one of my favorite books to read as a child and I take that as a compliment. What are you up to today? _

 

I shook my head and took a bite of the pop tart before taking a few minutes to add a contact name for him in my phone. I hesitated for a few seconds before deciding on the perfect name: ‘Knockoff Clifford’. I chuckled to myself as I texted back.

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ You should know that I’ve just added you to my contacts as ‘Knockoff Clifford’ _

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Hmmm, I guess that means you should be added as emo elf? On the previous topic, there is a cool coffee shop about a block away from the comic shop that you might like. I could meet you there if you wanted.  _

 

A few seconds later, another text came in.

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Of course, only if you want to, I didn’t mean to be creepy or anything.  _

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ No, that actually sounds great. What time are you free? _

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ This might sound embarrassing, but I’m already there, I tend to hang out there a lot.  _

 

I smirked and shook my head. This guy was a dork

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I’ll be there in 30. What’s the address? _

 

I finished the rest of my pop tart and grabbed a jacket before doubling back to the kitchen, decided to write a note to my father and Samantha.

_ Exploring the town today, be back by 6. _

By the time, I was out the door, Fake Clifford texted me the address and started walking in the direction of the comic shop. When I reached the comic shop, I decided to check my phone for directions and saw that it said the cafe was only a block away. I kept on walking while looking around for the sign. I finally recognized the place when I saw the man with the fiery red hair sitting at one of the small tables outside. As I neared closer to the cafe I waved to him with a smile.

When he saw me he smiled back and waved me over. If it wasn’t for his bright red hair, I don’t know if I would have spotted him. Instead of a plain band tee, he was now wearing a sleeveless one that looked like it had been worn a thousand times. The shirt was paired with a pair of ripped, black skinny jeans and a large pair of feminine sunglasses that covered the majority of his face. 

“Hey there emo boy,” he said, flashing me a lopsided grin. “Nice of you to join me.”

I blushed and looked down before sitting in the seat next to him. I looked at the table and saw some papers on the table before I looked at him worriedly. “Did I interrupt something? I don’t really wanna distract you from your work…” 

“No, no, don’t worry about that. I was just working on some things that I needed to get done before school started. I honestly don’t even want to be doing this right now, so you’re a welcome distraction.” He answered as he started to shuffle his papers around before putting them away in his bag and taking off his oversized sunglasses. “So, how are you liking Bellview so far?”

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair before responding. “I guess it’s okay, I didn’t really get a chance to look around that much. I only really was able to see the comic book store before I had to head home. It’s kinda just like any other town I guess.”

Right after I said that I heard an audible gasp from the other man and quickly looked up at him. His mouth was agape, and it looked like he was in shock. 

“I’m sorry, like any other town?” he said in an incredulous tone. “I’ll have you know that we are only 30 minutes from the greatest city in the world  _ and _ that there are plenty of great things to do in town.” 

“Really?” I mumbled as I raised my eyebrows in a way that suggested I didn’t believe a word of his statement

He laughed and replied, “Really. Don’t worry, this town grows on you. You’ll see.”

“I’m sure I will” I smiled. There was a moment of silence where we just sort of sat there and smiled. It wasn’t an awkward silence either like you’d imagine it to be. I noticed that his eyes were really brought out by his flaming red hair. They were a sort of green-brown color that contrasted against his pale skin. There was a piercing quality about them like his eyes could see right into a person, and pull out their deepest emotions. But at the same time, they felt safe and familiar. The sound of the rumble of a loud car passing by brought me back to where I was sitting and realized that we were at a coffee shop and hadn’t ordered anything to drink yet.

As if he knew what I had been thinking he laughed, “Hey, do you want something to drink, or would you rather we just sorta sit here?” My face sort of reddened at his remark, and in the back of my mind I felt self-conscious about the fact that I had sort of been staring at him, but he didn’t seem to mind. Of course, when I say staring, I mean it in a totally platonic,  _ dude _ , sort of way. He was attractive, I would give him that, but I wasn't interested in him at all. I mean, I had Jamia. Or...I  _ used  _ to have Jamia. 

We got up from the table and he showed me into the interior of the cafe. It was a sort of dark place with most of the light coming in through the windows. The walls were mostly brick with some wood beams lining the top. All around the space were pieces of art: sketches, sculpture, paintings. I was a really cool place. As we walked up to the counter a girl with short black hair pulled up into a loose bun appeared from the back. She smiled at us and asked us for our orders. 

With a quick glance at the chalkboard above the girls head on the wall, my new acquaintance said,  “Could I get a medium coffee?” 

“Of course! And what’s the name for the order?” the girl inquired

“Gerard.”

I looked up at him as he ran a hand through his scarlet coiffure. “So I finally get to know the mysterious name of Knockoff Clifford?” I teased.

He gave a smirk and replied, “I guess you do.”

After ordering and giving my name to the barista, Clifford, or as I now knew him, Gerard was looking at me smiling. “So emo boy’s name is actually Frank, huh? I would have thought that you would go by something more angsty. Something like  _ Wolftooth _ or  _ Rain _ .”

I groaned and shook my head at him, smiling slightly. “I’m named after my father! I’ll have you know that I come from a long line of Italians! I am  _ very  _ proud of my heritage.”

He chuckled at me before hearing his name called and picking up his drink. “That’s nice, but it doesn’t change the fact that you’re emo.” Before I could say anything else, Gerard started walking away from me back to where he was seated before. I started at him in disbelief and quickly picked up my drink before following him. 

“Wow, thanks. I really appreciate you attacking me. I honestly thought that coming here would be fun for me.” I said smiling, sarcasm dripping from my voice. Just then, I felt my phone buzz and quickly looked at it. It was Jamia. I hadn’t talked to Jamia since I left and instantly felt a pang of sadness. It must have shown on my face because Gerard’s voice pulled me out of my own thoughts.

“Hey, are you okay? Did someone die or something?” He chuckled nervously but also placed a reassuring hand on my shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. I looked up at him and shook my head, smiling sadly. 

“No, nothing like that. I just got a text from my ex,” I said, roughly running a hand through my hair 

“Oh, well you know what? Fuck him. Exes are awful.” I took me a minute to process what he truly said but then it hit me. He had said  _ fuck him.  _ Him, as in male; as in ex-boyfriend...did he think I was gay or something? I mean I knew I enjoyed wearing skinny jeans and stuff like that but... _ really _ ? People at home never thought that I was gay. Of course, that could just be an Ohio thing, but me, gay?

“Oh, no I didn’t mean-” I stammered

“Shhh, let's not talk about it. We can both agree that exes suck and can leave it at that.” He shot a friendly smile at me before tucking a loose strand of hair behind his ear. I decided to let his assumption about my sexuality slide and changed the topic.

“So...I remember you mentioned that there were  _ plenty _ of fun things to do in town?” 

“I did…” he said, beaming at me mischievously. 

“Well, I think now would be the time to convince me of some of the wonderful things you’ve been telling me about this town. At the risk of letting a stranger show me around an unfamiliar town, would you be willing to introduce me to some of your favorite spots?”

He looked down suddenly and checked his watch, looking upset. “I mean, I kinda have to go home…” I frowned and tried to hide my disappointment.

“No, that's fine, I mean, it was a dumb idea anyway.” Before I had time to look away, I felt him grab my hand and squeeze it tightly. I looked up to see him beaming at me again.

“I was joking! Jesus, Frank. It would be super cool to show you around. Where do you want to go?” he chuckled. I stared at him in disbelief before letting a look of betrayal cross my face and hitting his arm lightly. 

“You’re such a dick! I can’t believe you would do that!” I said in an outraged tone.

“Aww, come on, I’ll make it up to you” he grinned as he started to gather his papers that were still sprawled out on the table. “My car is parked right down the street, we could take a drive around town if you’d like,” he nodded his head down the street, indicating where his car must have been parked. “I can point the coolest places in town,” he added with a chuckle. I nodded and smiled before responding. 

“Yeah, sure.”  The minute I gave my consent, he threw his bag over his shoulder and grabbed my hand, pulling me out of my chair and out onto the sidewalk. He practically dragged me down the street until we reached a regular looking silver Prius. It was actually kind of funny to think that the guy with flaming red hair and a crazy personality owned such a normal car, but who was I to judge?

He unlocked to the car for me and I hopped into the front seat. He got in next to me and as he turned on the engine a David Bowie song started blaring from the speakers. He blushed furiously as he grasped at the radio, trying to turn it off. I burst out laughing and swatted him away from the dashboard, our hands lingering before I smiled, “Don’t you  _ dare  _ turn off a legend!”

He looked over, raised his eyebrows and smiled at me, “If you insist.” After he said this, I realized that our hands were still touching. I pulled mine away, maybe a tad to quickly and looked at my lap as I blushed. I didn’t want to add to his idea that I was gay or anything from before. 

He shook his head as he started the car and started to drive. The drive was relaxing as well as informational. As we drove around the small town, he pointed out all the major landmarks and places he liked to visit. I was sort of amazed by how much he knew about the history of it and at all of the random fun facts he seemed to have tucked away somewhere in his brain. While this was fun, my favorite thing about the ride was Gerard’s face. I don’t mean his actual facial features, but the change in emotions I could see as he would describe places. When he would point something out that he really loved, this silly lopsided grin would form on his face and he would look like a fuckin five-year-old in a candy store. 

By the end of the car ride, I felt like I’d known Gerard for my whole life. Before I knew it was over, Gerard broke our comfortable silence.

“What’s your address?”

“Oh wow. It’s already 5:42!” I exclaimed looking at my phone. I couldn’t believe that the whole day had gone by so quickly with him. I reluctantly told him my address and he started driving me to my dad’s house. I had to admit that I was having so much fun with him that I really didn’t want to go home. Of course, anything was better than sitting another dinner in awkward silence with my Dad and Samantha.

When we reached my house, I groaned reluctantly and started to get out of the car. Much to my surprise, Gerard got out of the car with me and grabbed my hand before I could start heading inside. “I know this is awkward and stuff, but I just wanted to say that I had fun with you today. You’re a pretty cool guy, Frankie.”   
“Yeah, I had a lot of fun today. Maybe Belleville won’t suck as much as I thought. Thanks for the ride. I really appreciate all of this.” 

Gerard was leaning against the hood of his car and sort of staring at me with his intense eyes. It seemed that he was pondering something. Before I could figure out what was happening he started to lean forward and put his hand on my waist. I felt his cool lips touch mine and press in a soft and hesitant way. To be honest, I wasn’t sure what was happening until a few seconds. He pulled away soon after that and smiled at me

“Have a goodnight, Frankie”

I stood there stunned for a second, and sort of stupidly walked up to my door and gave a quick wave before I stepped into the house, closing the door behind me. What the  _ fuck  _ had just happened?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Filler stuff that I didn't enjoy writing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really hate this chapter so maybe I will update twice in one week so that I can satisfy my need for Frank and Gerard flirting?  
> Sorry if there are typos

The minute I closed the door, I wanted to scream. Did he really just  _ kiss _ me? More importantly, did I enjoy it? Before I had time to really process anything, I heard my father call for me. 

“Welcome home Frankie. Dinner is almost ready.” I nodded and mumbled something about taking a quick shower and mindlessly walked up to my room. As soon as I closed the door I collapsed. My mind was racing and I could hardly breathe as the kiss replayed in my mind. Gerard kissed me.  _ He _ kissed me. More importantly, I think I liked it. 

But that can’t be possible. Before this, I would have never thought of a man in that way nor would I have kissed one. Why was he different? I suddenly realized that I could feel warm tears running down my face, the salty flavor trickling onto my lip; the place where Gerard’s lips had been just a minute ago. I could feel my body pulsing as my heart rapidly pounded inside my chest. What was happening to me? 

I tried to take a few breaths before trying to stand up. I immediately felt dizzy again but tried to make it to my bed. My head was still spinning and I couldn’t think straight. I dug my nails into the edge of my bed to ground myself but still the room continued to spin. I took a few more deep breaths before feeling stable enough to stand. I mindlessly walked toward the shower and turned it on before I quickly stripped my clothes off. 

I stepped into the shower and let the warm water hit my already hot skin. I let my tears flow freely down my face mixing with the water spraying from the showerhead. Why was I feeling like this?

Before I had time to let my feelings soak in and think about what had happened, I heard a tentative knock on the door. I groaned softly when I heard the knock, willing whoever it was to go away. 

“Frankie? It’s time for dinner hun. Are you feeling alright?” I rubbed my eyes and sucked in a deep breath, trying to sound normal.

“Yeah, just felt a bit dizzy when I got home. I’m better now; I’ll down in a few.”

“Okay, sweetie, just let me know if you need anything. See you downstairs.” I let out an almost audible sigh of relief when I heard my bedroom door close. I stood in the shower for a few minutes before decided that I should actually shower instead of just standing there like an idiot. 

The shower actually did a pretty good job of calming me down and by the time I was done washing myself, I could pretty much form coherent thoughts and decided that I should probably get out of the shower. I quickly threw on some clothes and walked downstairs to be greeted by my Father and Samantha sitting at the dining table eating. 

“Nice of you to finally join us,” my father mumbled before shoveling a forkful of food in his mouth. I nodded quickly and sat down where my plate was set before replying. 

“Sorry, I just got super nauseous when I was out and needed to take a breather,” Before I could say anything more, Sam interrupted the conversation.

“Do you need me to warm that up for you? It might be a tad cold, it has been sitting out for a little bit.” I took a bite of my food quickly before shaking my head. 

“No, this is fine, it isn’t that cold,” I mumbled before putting another forkful of it into my mouth. Sam nodded and continued to eat in silence. My father grumbled an excuse about going to his office room to respond to some email (probably wanting to avoid any more of the uncomfortable atmosphere) and left Sam and me in awkward silence. I tried to make some small talk while eating but all of our conversations led back to the panoramic silence. I ate as fast as I could and when my plate was empty I made a half-assed excuse to go to my room.

When I reached my room, I saw my phone flashing with a notification and was instantly reminded of what had happened today. I nervously walked over to where my phone was to look at the message. 

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I had fun last night, we should do it again soon. xx _

I groaned and fell back on the bed, choosing to ignore the message. I wasn’t really angry at him for kissing me, I was more angry at myself for leading him on today. On top of that, I think that I might have enjoyed it which left me feeling even more confused and angry. I fiddled with my phone for a few minutes before I decided to ignore the text for the night and let me think the situation through.

Before I turned my phone off for the night, I remembered that Jamia texted me earlier. I unlocked my phone quickly and looked at her message.

 

**From: Jamia**

_ Hey, I know that we aren’t together and stuff, but I just wanted to let you know that I miss you and that I hope that you’re doing well. _

 

Could today get any worse? Jamia knew that we had broken up. She was well aware of the fact that I had moved 9 hours away from her, and we’d probably never see each other again. And she definitely knew that I still had feelings for her and would take her back the second she asked. Against my better judgment, I quickly typed out a reply.

**To: Jamia**

_ Things are going well here, I really miss home and everyone. Especially you. Have a nice night. _

 

The minute I sent the text to her, I regretted what I said.  _ Especially you _ . What was I thinking? Before she had a chance to reply, I sent another text. 

 

**To: Jamia**

_ Ignore the especially you. Sorry, it’s just really lonely here. Hopefully, we’re still good? Anyways, I think I’m gonna head to bed. Night.  _

 

I didn’t wait for a response and shut my phone off for the night. I looked at the clock that was resting on my dresser and debated if 9:00 was too early to go to bed. Deep down, I knew that it was so I decided to look through the  _ Batman _ comic again. While that  _ was  _ my goal, I really couldn’t focus on the comic due to the fact that my mind was still racing from the events of the day.

I couldn’t be gay, could I? Before this, I had never felt any sort of attraction to a guy whatsoever. But somehow, when Gerard had kissed me, I  _ actually _ enjoyed it. Would this count as a rebound? I mean, he kinda looked somewhat like Jamia, if you would squint your eyes and tilted your head. Actually, no, that’s a lie. Jamia and Gerard looked nothing alike. There’s no way that I could have enjoyed that kiss. I mean, Gerard is a dude and I  _ don't _ like dudes.

However, there was one thing that I couldn’t deny. Gerard was attractive. Not only this, but Gerard knew that he was attractive. After only spending a day with him, I was able to pick up his little quirks such as the way that he swayed his hips when he walked, or how he talked out of one side of his mouth. The more I thought about it, the more feminine he seemed to me, and the more normal my attraction to him seemed. Maybe this was a fluke and I was only attracted to him. Maybe he was special.

I sighed and laid down in my bed, getting under the covers. Today was an exhausting day that really only led to me questioning my sexuality. Before I knew what was going on, I felt myself falling asleep to me recalling the events of the day  _ especially _ his lips on mine. 

* * *

 

I awoke the next morning with a tight feeling in my stomach as I remembered the events of the night before. Honestly, I just wanted to avoid that whole situation that had happen and salvage what was left of my summer before senior year. To take my mind off things I went down to the kitchen to get some breakfast. After eating some breakfast, I walked back upstairs to throw some clothes on. I got dressed quickly and grabbed my phone from the nightstand, turning it on. Once it was on, I saw that I had two new messages, one from Jamia and one from Gerard. I opened up Jamia’s first. 

 

**From: Jamia**

_ We’re chill. Hopefully it doesn’t get too lonely over there. When does school start for you? _

 

I sighed, relieved that I didn’t really fuck things up with her. Maybe we could actually be friends. I quickly typed out a reply to her. 

 

**To: Jamia**

_ It starts in two weeks. Nothing much to do here until then really. This town is really boring so far. _

 

I grimaced at what I just texted, remembering how much Gerard loved this town. I prayed that he was right and I could find something to do before school started and I was confined to hell. I thought about ignoring the text from Gerard but decided against it, feeling bad for ignoring him after he showed me around yesterday.

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Hopefully, everything is okay, I didn’t mean to scare you or anything. Have a nice night, Frankie.  _

 

I felt immediate regret in my stomach when I read his text. Was he actually worried about me? I didn’t mean to upset him and felt awful for making him think that he did something wrong. I mean, he did kiss me, but that's beside the point. 

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Everything is okay. Just a little stressed for school to begin. Yesterday was great. Thanks for everything.  _

 

Gerard replied almost immediately, shocking me. 

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Okay, that's good. I get it with the stress from school, hopefully, that will die down. Maybe we could hang out again before it starts? _

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I have a ton to do before school starts, I’ll text you if I have time? _

 

I felt bad but I really couldn’t handle facing him again. I was already confused enough as it was, and I knew that if I saw him in person, it would only make me more confused. Before I had a chance to set my phone down, he replied.

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Yeah, I get it, good luck with school. _

* * *

 

A week passed by without me contacting Gerard. While I may not have talked to him during this week, I definitely thought about him. I’m not saying that he was  _ all  _ that I could think about, but I  _ did _ struggle with trying to keep his face out of my mind. I even dreamt about him one night. The morning after the dream, I woke up very uncomfortable, with a very noticeable bulge in my pants.

Aside from me thinking about Gerard constantly, the week was pretty uneventful. I was able to explore the town a little more and get to know my surroundings and was able to get stuff for school. I might have been going into my senior year in high school, but it didn’t make me any less nervous. I was going into this school year not knowing anyone and with the ever creeping suspicion that I was not straight. 

To be honest, I was actually dreading the start of school. Maybe this feeling of impending doom is what led me to contact him. Maybe it was because I knew nobody in town still and was getting extremely lonely. I probably shouldn’t have texted him, I still was uncomfortable with the fact that he kissed me, and even more so with the fact that I might be gay. 

However, even though I knew this, I still texted him. It happened on a Monday night. There was a week until school started, and I could feel the anxiety starting to build. I think that I hoped that he would quell my anxiety. Wow, I really like making excuses. Anyways, I ended up texting the man that had me questioning my sexuality. 

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Hey, sorry about before. Can you forgive me for being a dick? _

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Yeah, it's fine. Hopefully, your week was alright. Are you excited for school? _

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I'm actually kind of dreading it. It’ll be weird because I don't know anybody and I’ll be the odd one out. _

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Everyone is in the same boat though, it’ll be okay. I’m sure that you’ll find some great friends.  _

What did he mean by saying that everyone was in the same boat as me? I mean I was joining a new school for my senior year, surely everyone knew everybody who went there right? Maybe he was referring to how everyone would be nervous for the school year to start. Anyways, I chose to ignore what he was talking about and change the subject. 

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Yeah, I guess. Are you free this week? It would be cool to see you before hell starts.  _

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I don’t know, I have a ton to do before school starts. _

 

I sighed as I read his text, upset that I thought that things could go back to how they were last week. I was stupid to text him and was pissed at myself for thinking that he would actually like me. Just as I was about to profusely apologize, another text came in. 

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I’m kidding, by the way. I would love to hang out. When are you free? _

 

I held back the urge to text him right away, and actually thought about when I was free. I had to finalize some things before going to school next week, so I probably couldn’t hang out tomorrow or Wednesday. My dad said that he took off work on Thursday so that we could make sure that I had everything I needed before school starts. So, after thinking, I texted him back. 

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ How about Friday or Saturday? Where would you wanna go? _

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Friday night sounds good. How about we go get ice cream and walk around? _

 

**To: Knockoff Clifford**

_ Why does everything with you involve you showing me around? Sound great. What time? _

 

**From: Knockoff Clifford**

_ I want you to be able to appreciate the beauty of Belleville. I’ll pick you up at 6:30.  _

 

While I was excited to see him again, I was also very nervous. What would I do if he tried to kiss me again? I honestly didn’t know what I would do if he kissed me again, nor had I come to terms with me questioning my own sexuality. While I had only known Gerard for a week, I already knew that he was causing me to have feelings that I had never had before. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof. It has been months. I'm sorry. I might try to get back into writing this but honestly, no promises. However, I hope y'all like this chapter.

The week leading up to the date (was it a date?) was filled with anxiety. Anytime I was not busy, my mind would immediately wander back to Gerard and what would happen on Friday. Would he kiss me again? Did I want him to kiss me again? Maybe I did. Maybe that's why I texted him on Monday. Maybe I realized that whenever I thought about him my head would spin.  
Amongst all of the anxiety, I actually was able to get a bunch of stuff done for school. My Dad and I got the rest of my school supplies, and he even let me get some stuff for my room. On Wednesday, the rest of my stuff arrived and I spend the whole day decorating my new room. Thursday morning, my Father made me tour the school so that I could get accustomed to where everything was. There were a few other kids at the school and they didn’t seem awful. The school had another senior show me around the school and talk to me about the teachers and classes. The guy was nice enough and even told me what teachers to try and avoid. He mentioned an English teacher, Mr. Way, that was supposed to be super nice at first but could get really intense with homework and papers once he started the units on novels. I made a note to stay away from him. The rest of the tour was pretty uneventful and I still dreaded going back to school. By Thursday night, I was not only worried about seeing Gerard but also worried about school starting and how awful it would be.  
On Friday morning I woke up with a giant knot in my stomach. The fact that I would be seeing Gerard in less than 12 hours made me want to throw up. Since it was almost 9 am, I knew that I had a ton of time before I needed to get ready. To pass the time, I decided to start to redecorate my room. I hung up some of my posters that my mom sent over and even moved my furniture around to make my room more ‘me’. By the time that I got my room to my liking, it was noon and I decided that I should try to eat something.  
When I walked downstairs, I saw that there was a note on the fridge and nobody to be seen. I grabbed the note from the fridge and saw it was from Samantha.  
Going out with your father, be back soon! I made you lunch in the fridge.  
I had to admit, even though Samantha could be annoying at times, she was really trying to get to know me and she did really love my father. I set the note to the side and opened the fridge to see a sandwich that Sam must have made for me. I took the sandwich to the living room and turned on the TV while I ate. Nothing really caught my interest, so I settled on watching a rerun of The Office. I picked at my sandwich mindlessly and tried to shake the butterflies that were making me nauseous. I sat on the couch for an hour, unable to eat or even enjoy the show. My mind would not stop racing about what would happen tonight. Would he kiss me? Would I kiss him? Did I want to kiss him? I barely even know this guy yet I’m letting his stupid face get into my head.  
After another 30 minutes of picking at my food, I decide that it is pointless to eat and head back up to my room. Was it still too early to get ready? Probably. I threw myself onto the bed with a huge sigh and decided to scroll through Instagram to waste some time. It made me sad to look at all of my old friends together, enjoying the last moments of summer. I guess John and Shaun threw a huge party last weekend because my feed was filled with crazy photos from the party. I really missed everyone. As I kept scrolling, I got more and more upset. When I came across a photo from Jamia, I was shocked. In the photo, she was kissing my best friend, Tim. I wanted to scream. It had been less than a month since I had moved and Jamia had already moved on from me. I threw my phone across the room in frustration and buried my head into my pillow. Fuck Jamia. Even though we were broken up, I still had feelings for her and this really stung. I couldn’t believe that she would move on so fast and that she would get together with my best friend. However, instead of moping on my bed over her, I decided to get up, grab my phone, and get ready. Before I grabbed my clothes, I unlocked my phone and went to Jamia’s contact. I stared at her number for a few minutes before I decided to delete her contact. Just like that, I had made the first step to erasing her from my life. Before setting my phone down, I decided to send a quick text to Gerard.

**To: Knockoff Clifford**   
_Hey, I just wanted to say that I’m really excited for tonight which is lame of me I guess but still, I’m excited._

Before I could see if he would reply, I set my phone down and walked over to my dresser. I dug through the drawers, looking for the perfect outfit. It wasn’t like me to care about how I looked, but I guess that the adrenaline and nerves running through my veins changed this. It took me about 5 minutes to find an outfit that I liked. I ended up choosing a basic t-shirt under a jean jacket and some black pants. After getting dressed, I glanced at my clock and sighed when I realized that it was only 2 pm. There were still four and a half hours till I saw Gerard and I was already shaking. I couldn’t wait like this much longer. I needed to go out and do something so that I wouldn’t be a total wreck by the time that I saw him. I debated trying to take a nap but I knew that there was no way that I would be able to fall asleep feeling like this. I looked around my room, searching for something to do when the view outside my window caught my eye. Right across the street, there seemed to be a small park that I hadn’t seen before. From what I could see, there was a small playground and maybe even a few trails to walk on. I picked up my phone off of the dresser and set an alarm for 6:00 pm, making sure that I wouldn't be late for Gerard. After this, I plugged in my headphones, turned on my “Teen Angst” playlist and headed for the park.  
Once I arrived, I took a brief look around the area and found that it was larger than I had previously thought. The playground had 2 sets of swings, a couple of slides, and a jungle gym. To the right of the playground was a path that led away from my house and out of town. Directly behind the playground, there was a small pond that some people were fishing in. There were a handful of people scattered around the park that I could see. The majority of them were kids playing on the playground. I thought about swinging on the swings but I didn’t want to be that teen that disturbs all of the kids when they were having fun. Avoiding this, I decided to take the path and go for a little walk. When I was home, one of my favorite things to do was to walk on trails with my friends. Jamia and I actually had our first kiss when we went hiking one day. I don’t know what it is, but I always feel more grounded when in nature.  
I took my time on the trail. Just like the park, the trail was larger than I expected and even had some small hills and a creek that ran by. It honestly was harder than I expected and was even a little out of breath by the time that I reached the end of the trail. I checked my phone and gasped when I saw that it was already 4 pm. How did I spend two hours on a trail? Worried that I would be rushed for time, I quickened my pace on the way back. It would be just my luck to get lost in the woods when I had plans in two hours.  
I was about halfway back to the park when I saw a dog sprinting at full speed toward me. Before I had time to react and look for an owner, the dog plowed into me. The dog was large and knocked me straight onto my ass when he collided with me.  
“What the fuck?” I mumbled as the dog circled around me, tail wagging. As angry as I was, I had to admit that the dog was cute. It has brown curly fur and looked like it must have been a labradoodle or something similar. Before I could check for tags or anything, I heard a girl call out.  
“Oh my gosh! I’m so sorry, she usually doesn’t run away from me like that!” As she turned the corner, she saw me, sitting on my ass with her dog and started running toward me. “Are you okay? Holy shit, she really plowed into you!”  
“Yeah, I’m fine, just a little shocked I guess. But no harm, no foul” I chuckled thinking about what just happened and flashed the girl a smile. She was taller than me, but not by much and had short black hair. Before I could say anything else, she reached out and shook my hand.  
“Well, I’m glad that you’re okay. I’m Lindsey, and this is Moki” She grinned back at me and motioned to her dog. “I promise that he usually isn’t this hyper, I just haven’t taken him on a hike in a while and I think he had a ton of pent-up energy. I’m glad he ran into you because you slowed him down. Well, I’m not glad that he ran into you but I am glad that he stopped running. Again I’m super sorry”  
I laughed, shaking my head and nodded. “No, I totally get it. Well, it was nice meeting you Lindsey, and I’m glad that I could slow down Moki” I started on my way again, really worried about time. However, before I could leave, I heard the girl shout to me.  
”What’s your name?”  
Turning around, I called back to her before continuing on my way. “Frank!”.  
“Nice to meet you Frank!”

* * *

  
I got home around 6:15. This gave me 15 minutes to clean up from my little adventure of the day. I honestly wasn’t too dirty and still looked pretty decent. However, there were definitely a few spots on my pants from where I fell.  
Once I was done cleaning up, I glanced at my phone for the first time in hours. I swiped through a couple of emails and other junk before I saw that Tim had posted for the first time in a while. I immediately clicked on it and an image of Jamia and Tim making out flashed before my eyes. While the photo itself made my blood boil, I was more hurt that he didn’t tell me. It felt as if everyone just forgot me the moment I left. These were the people that I trusted for years and years and told my deepest secrets to. But here they were, betraying my trust and sneaking behind my back. I wish stuff like this didn’t affect me, but it really did.  
That moment, the doorbell rang. “Shit,” I mumbled as I ran down the stairs, still angry from what I saw. I didn’t want to see him when I was like this. I honestly didn’t even want to go out anymore. I would have been perfectly contented to punch and scream into my pillow for an hour before falling asleep from mental and physical exhaustion.  
However, that is not what I did. To be honest, I don’t even think I was controlling my own movements at this point. Once I was downstairs, I went straight to the door and opened it. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was angry and sad and adrenaline was running through me. I’m not proud of what I did. I’m actually quite embarrassed. But, when I saw the man in the doorway all I could do was kiss him. And that's what I did.


End file.
